St. George's Episcopal Church Roseburg, Oregon A Wedding, January 9, 2005 Go To St. George's Home Page |
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Song of Solomon 2:10-13; 8:6-7
Psalm 67:1-11
Colossians 3:12-17
Mk 10:6-9
Jesus said to the Pharisees, “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Mk 10:6-9)
A Wedding Homily
By the Rev. Dr. Bill Stroop, Rector
When _____ and _____ first approached me about this wedding, I was thrilled. It is always and honor and a privilege to preside at a wedding. This is particularly so when the man and the woman are mature and have the experience and wisdom to recognize love as a gift of grace, and to grasp it and nurture it.
But we were especially the recipients of grace when _____ and _____ chose January 9 as their wedding day, and we decided to do the ceremony as the 8:00 am worship service. You see, January 9 is also the first day after Epiphany – the day when we traditionally celebrate the Baptism of Jesus by John at the river
First, _____ and _____ wanted to share their wedding with their closest friends. And those people are you – the eight a.m. congregation here at St. George’s. So it made perfect sense to celebrate their wedding as the Sunday service where all of you could be present and join with them in celebrating their union with each other, and the blessing of that union by the church. After all, Sunday is the day designated for worship, and that is also what a wedding is as well: a time to worship the God who creates, sustains, and loves us.
Second, it is so very theologically appropriate for a wedding to take place on the day commemorating the baptism of Jesus, because both weddings and baptisms involve profound transformation and reordering of our lives. John, as you know, was a desert-dwelling holy man who came to the Jordan River and preached that the kingdom of heaven was very near. He believed that the messiah was coming and would judge the world (Mt 3:10-12). And to help the people prepare for this, John offered a sacrament of repentance allowing people an opportunity to be symbolically cleansed and for them to make vows to follow a new path; a path of righteousness. Both baptism and marriage acknowledge the importance of the divine in our lives. Marriage and baptism both involve the making of vows – indicating a desire to amend our lives, and to follow a new path.
Third, baptism and marriage acknowledge the importance of community to the personal processes of transformation. When Jesus came to John to be baptized, he did not do privately. He came to be baptized with others who heard John and who had made the decision to amend their lives and follow a new path. Baptism, from the very beginning, is something done in community that acknowledges the presence of a living community of faith. This is in part why, in our tradition, baptisms are done in church on special days during the year – including this day, the Feast of the Baptism of Jesus. Baptisms are occasions when we welcome new members, and simultaneously reaffirm its own commitment to seek and serve Christ in all persons, and to treat everyone with dignity and respect.
Both baptism and marriage call the participants to move from where they are to what they can become. Although _____ and _____ are different from one another, I became aware that their dependence on God being at the center of their lives was central to their merging life together. At the same time, it is obvious to all of us here how much their love for one another binds them together. And their life experience helps them understand so much about the relationships between love and forgiveness. They wisely know that love given and accepted in gratitude will bind them together in perfect harmony.
Love creates new things out of old things, transcends differences, and heals deep wounds from the past. And it is love that prompts these two people to come forth in their community, surrounded by their friends, family, and supporters as they join to one another as husband and wife.
In the presence of this community, and in the sight of God, through the action of the Holy Spirit, _____ and _____ will make a new creation today. They will create the “We.” The “We” is more than a “you” and a “me,” because with a “we” there is an intrinsic loss of the individual people as the “We” emerges. The person previously identified as a “me” undergoes a form of death, and is resurrected as a new life.
The “We” that emerges today will be a living entity that is totally dependent on the care and nurture of both partners to flourish. The “We” is an entity that both the husband and wife are responsible to.
Deep love implies three things: the lover, the person who is loved, and the bond of love uniting them both. The “We” is that bond of love. It is the incarnated presence of God. It is that spiritual “We” that we recognize in this ceremony and that the church blesses.
In creating their “We,” _____ and _____ willingly give away their freedom. In creating their “We,” they take each other’s burdens onto themselves. They bind their lives together as they set each other as a seal upon their hearts.
They will still both have their lives apart as well as a life together; Tuesday will still be poker night. But a marriage made in Heaven is one where two people become more richly themselves together in the “We” than they could ever manage as individuals. And, with God’s help as the third party, and the firm foundation upon which the new relationship exists, the “We” will continue to change and develop as their life together grows.
_____ and _____, it is our wish for you that you always remain steadfastly aware of the presence of God in your relationship. We pray that you will always be aware of the foundation God has provided to you in your new life together as you face the challenges and experience the blessings that life brings to you in the years to come. God be with you and with the “We” that you and God have created together. Know that we are here in Christ to support you, and love you, in your new life together.
Song of Solomon 2:10-13; 8:6-7
My beloved speaks and says to me: "Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away; for now the winter is past, the rain is over and gone. The flowers appear on the earth; the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. The fig tree puts forth its figs, and the vines are in blossom; they give forth fragrance. Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away. Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm; for love is strong as death, passion fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, a raging flame. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If one offered for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly scorned.
May God be merciful to us and bless us, *
show us the light of his countenance and come to us.
Let your ways be known upon earth, *
your saving health among all nations.
Let the peoples praise you, O God; *
let all the peoples praise you.
Let the nations be glad and sing for joy, *
for you judge the peoples with equity
and guide all the nations upon earth.
Let the peoples praise you, O God; *
let all the peoples praise you.
The earth has brought forth her increase; *
may God, our own God, give us his blessing.
May God give us his blessing, *
and may all the ends of the earth stand in awe of him.
As God”s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Jesus said to the Pharisees, “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
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Copyright © 2005, William G. Stroop - All Rights Reserved.
6 January 2005
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